Hello dear reader!
Did you know that the secret of self-control, like many may think, isn’t(just) willpower? According to this article of NYT: “People who can delay gratification and master their impulses thrive in life. And experts say that you can learn skills to rein in bad habits.”
Well, if you are a christian, this isn’t new to you, right? What the bible say about self-control? Let’s read some verses:
Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city. Proverbs 16:32
Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control. Proverbs 25:28
Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. Titus 2:2
“For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love.” 2 Peter 1:5-7
The bible also says that self-control or moderation is a Fruit of the Sipirit(“But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control; and here there is no conflict with Jewish laws. Galatians 5:22-23)
Here we have the notion that all those characteristics that are desirable in christian life, does not come only by our own efforts. It’s a Fruit of the Sipirit. We need to know God intimately and walk with Him so we can develop those virtues.
However, there are also some practical ways we can grow in self-control, and I will use some of the tips of nyt article, but also, and more importantly, bible advices of how we can achieve it!
First, we need to know that, likewise self-control, the bible also encourages us toward discipline, wich is something that God himself loves to apply in our lives, his sons and daughters!
“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord,
nor be weary when reproved by him.
6 For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
and chastises every son whom he receives.”
7 It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? 8 If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. 11 For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.“
“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.” Proverbs 12:1
“Remember to warn your children when they do something wrong. If you punish them with a stick, you will not kill them. 14 Punishment may save them from death. Proverbs 23:12-13
“Blessed is the man whom you discipline, O Lord,
and whom you teach out of your law,
to give him rest from days of trouble,
until a pit is dug for the wicked.” Psalm 94:13
Discipline is part of the process of a Christian life! If we want to achieve self-control, we need to allow God’s discipline in our lives. And that means we must also apply discipline in our own daily matters.
1. Have a routine!
That can involve bible reading, praying, working out, waking up early every day, have a task planned beforehand.
If we only depend on spare time or willpower to do those things, we are in a big trouble. We need to establish a goal and have a routine toward it, so we can see some improvement.
2. Pray always (and before every decision):
Well, this is a obvious tip to a christian, however, sometimes we forget the we must depend on God, that is his will for us! Not only when we are in need, but we are also encouraged to pray and consult Him before every step and decision in our lives!
3. Get away with everything that is obsolete!
I think this is one of most challenging steps to achieve discipline and self-control: Edit your life in a way that you get rid of everything that robs you: Bad habits(like spending hours on Netflix), people who are not walking the same path than you( that means don’t associate in friendship or romantic relationship with people who does not love and fear God, and does not consider the Word of God their standard). Also, manage your time on social media to the least possible each day, improving your quiet time and doing things that does not involve technology.
4. Less screen time, more readings!
This tip is related to the former, since the goal is to get rid with things that not add value in your life, like screen time, be INTENTIONAL with your reading! Start with the bible, at least a chapter a day, I’d say) but also includes other good readings, to improve your skills and imagination. There is a whole new amazing world inside of great books.
5. Consider other people needs before you own!
We are naturally self-centered and we need to be very intentional in serving others. Let’s be more considerable of the needs of those around us. It can be family members, people at the church, coworkers etc). Do a nice gesture to help someone, despite your own needs. This is a personal challenge, for sure.
6. Write your progress down!
Keeping notes is a great strategy to monitor your own progress. The bible also encourages us to do it. Specially hwen we bring to our memory what God already did in our lives! We need him everyday, for every purpose. Look bak and write down what improved in your life, regarding your own efforts, but most importantly, regarding the blessings and faithfulness of God in your faith walk!
7. Embrace a new project!
This is a great strategy to leave your confort zone and improve your personal skills: Do something that you love but at the same time, challenges you! This is a good way to practice discipline: Managing your time, emotions and priorities.
I hope these tips help you to be more aware of your actions and enable you to control the way you react and make choices toward life!
However, let’s remember that every big change is made by small steps, day-by-day. This List It’s not supose to overhelm you, but to help you to organize your time and priorities in life. So, be easy on yourself and keep going!
Have a great day folks!
I was lost. His love found me! 